Driving Madam

So, this morning, I walked to my trainer's studio. What's the big deal, you say? Well, in most cases, this would not be novel - I walked everywhere in Baltimore, to the drugstore, the supermarket, the movie theater, the wine store (oh, wait, those are all on my block!). And that's just it, in Gurgaon, I don't really walk anywhere - mostly because nothing is really in walking distance.

However, what was novel about walking this morning is that normally my driver takes me to the trainer (I usually go at 7 am right and need to be home quickly to get ready for work). Last night, however, I decided that I would walk so I didn't have to have my driver come get me so early.

Now, I know he "works" for me and so its his job to pick me up and take me places regardless of the time of day, but I feel really guilty about having him get up really early on a Saturday, drive an hour to come get me to go to the gym and then wait around the rest of the day until I need to go out again. Usually, I try and plan my day so that I have a bunch of driving related stuff grouped together. But today, I didn't really have a lot planned between going to the gym (at 830) and going to a party tonight (at 8) other than needing to get some groceries. So I thought it was rude for me to ask Madan (that's his name) to come get me at 8 and then sit around all day. Is that odd? Am I the only one who does this? (this is obviously geared to expats)

Having a driver has been an interesting experience for me. First, let me say this, Madan is great - he isn't late, he never grumbles (no matter how early I ask him to come or how late he has to be out) and he loves Jai. He not only drives me around, but he also serves as Jai's dog walker during the week so Jai gets time out of the flat at least twice during the day. Naturally, Jai loves him too.

Madan is also a great driver. He's aggressive in a way that I could never be here and yet I never feel unsafe in the car with him AND he knows where everything is located. He's the driver the other drivers look to for directions. Then there's the added benefit of never needing a designated driver when I'm out with friends. Having a driver is a luxury I never imagined having.

All that being said, I don't really love it.

The thing is, I am an American and that means I love to drive - myself. I really miss the freedom of driving myself where I want when I want. Which can't happen if I've told Madan that I'm done for the day and he leaves and I realize an hour later that I need to go to the store for milk. I also really kind of find it weird that someone knows my whereabouts, what time I was out until, where I went this morning - all the time. It's kind of like checking in but with a total stranger.

Sure, its convenient to have someone else drive so you don't have to stop and park the car, but I've found that being stuck in traffic as a passenger is just as bad a being stuck in traffic as the driver.

Then there's the whole Madam thing. Madan will not call be by my first name. I tried. I insisted - but it was a no go. So it's always Good Morning Madam, Good Evening Madam, Where to go Madam? - I'm too young to be called Madam! I obviously would prefer to have him call me by my first name as I do him, but I've come to accept, it's never gonna happen. It just bothers me that the culture imposes this class division.

I'm sure there will be times when I'm back in the US that I will very much miss having a driver - but as a whole, I don't think I'll be too sad about giving it up.