So last night I went on a date - a real live, actual date - with a frenchie. He is a sweet guy, who speaks not so great english with a sweet french accent and tolerates my very bad french. It was fun - we went out near the Bastille neighborhood that I had visited this past week. I was happy to be surrounded by people who actually live in Paris and not be in a touristy place. Paris seems to have a great nightlife - one I've been ignoring a bit - and which I expect to take more advantage of. Going out did not remind me of any of the places in Baltimore (quelle surprise!) but did remind me a little of London with people spilling out of the bars and drinking in the street. Which may have as much to do with the great number of people who still smoke when smoking is now prohibited in bars. A welcome change for me. I had a great time - even if he wasn't the right guy - sorry.
But it did make me think about some of the people I met in class who are visiting their boyfriends here in Paris - the boyfriends don't speak Russian or English (as the girls do) or speak it poorly, and the girls didn't know any French. It made me wonder how you have a relationship with someone when there is such a language barrier - how do you know you've understood what the other person said - when they are being sarcastic, funny etc. I feel like things get lost in translation even when the two people speak the same language - how much gets lost in translation when they don't? What happens if they hate being spiritual and you've misunderstood what they said and you think they are spiritual and that's important to you? How do you know if match up politically? I guess what I'm wondering is that even though it is hard to know anyone completely - how do you get to the point of knowing someone at all if you don't speak the same language - enough to consider moving to Paris to be with that person? Or is this something that is easier than I think?
Thoughts?
Interestingly - or so I think - my uncle married a French woman he met in WWII. They met when he was stationed near Paris, fell in love (love? lust? who knows) and got married. He shipped her back to the USA where she stayed with my grandparents. My mother was 11-12 years younger than her brother so she was still at home. She says they wore out several English/French dictionaries. I always wondered the same thing -- how you fall in love with someone with whom you can't carry on verbal communication, but I think I value too lightly non-verbal communication, if you get my drift. Of course, I find myself incapable of forcing anyone to love me so how would I know anything about it to begin with, eh? Your trip sounds great. Sorry you'll miss the judge's party but we'll spend a bit of time envying you. Delbridge
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